I lost four loved ones last year.
I wish things were easy to accept when sad things happen in your life. I miss them very much, my parents, sister and brother. So many plans have been shattered in just one month. Lord, help me.
Last year, I chose a life away from them. Temporarily. Because I was confident that we would still be seeing each other when international travel is less complicated without the threat of the covid virus.
I could not avoid sadness since. I just wish I have my own family to lean on. My other siblings are abroad with their own families. They are sad too but they have someone to motivate them to live on. And me? I don't know what is my motivation now.
I really wish things were easy.
Easy job. Easy to earn money. Easy to be happy. Easy to love. Easy to build a family. Easy to cure pains and diseases.
Things are really different now. I like to believe the world will end soon. And someday we will all be reunited. That is in heaven. We all believe in God, and heaven is our real home.
I wish things were that easy to accept. I wish I will be able to be genuinely happy again soon. I can smile and laugh but I didn't think they were genuine. I will probably get tired of that soon.
Please Lord, fill me with your love so I can give love. Please don't make it too hard for me that I can't bear it. You promised you will not give me trials that I can't bear.
I wish things were easy. To those who can relate, to my pain, let us not give up on our faith in God. Let us not question God's design. He will reveal to us the answers to all our questions at the proper time.
